Joy, just found your site and I appreciate this post and have a contribution to your position. In 2001, the week after 911, my wife & I joined a church that was a Willow Associate Church. It was growing in the area of phase I…hooking seekers using all the check boxes. As I observed the Pastor, I saw his frustration when the Contemporary Praise Band produced CDs & went on tour. How could he control such volunteers? He killed the volunteers by putting them on the payroll. As other volunteers became vital, he quickly killed the volunteers…by putting them on the payroll. The payroll grew, the staff grew, the Pastor controlled his former volunteers by putting them on payroll - ending their volunteer spirit. Thank you for maintaining your volunteer spirit. Blessings.
Thanks, Phil. This is helpful. I hadn’t considered how adding volunteers to the payroll might be a means of control for an insecure leader. But that makes a lot of sense. What a shame. And what a loss when the dynamics change from people offering their gifts freely and generously, without the thought of being paid … to feeling required to “perform” for an employer instead.
This issue becomes a bit more complicated when, like me, the woman being treated unequally is the sole provider for her family. As much as I would like to remain content with a Mary heart, I still need to pay all my bills.
That’s a good point. Too often churches and other employers fail to consider that a woman may be the breadwinner in the family. It shouldn’t be assumed that work is “optional” for her.
I was on the tech team at a church and in the process of updating the website. One Sunday I read the church leaders' public notes about a recent meeting and found out they hired someone to make a new website. Tech team didn't know about it and everyone else on the team was so angry they refused to meet with the guy. I met with him, learned enough to know it would never work; his plans where not compatable with what we had in place and we were not going to support a change. The tech team met with the lead pastor to tell him so. He was a little put out but didn't have other options. Later, I asked him if they'd pay me to make a good website. He said words that are burned into my brain forever, "we can't pay everyone for everything they do." And that was that. I'm certain they paid the other guy for his doomed attempt but scoffed at the idea of paying me. I never finished updating the website.
Thank you for sharing what has surely been the experience of many women. Like you, I joyfully volunteered my time (I loved my congregation!) to the point that visitors often assumed I was on staff and wanted to know what my position was.
I appreciate your blunt assessment: "It was about whether the pastors thought a woman’s work for the church was valuable — at all." And "...just about any ministry run by a man took precedence over women’s programs in terms of budget, time, and staffing."
Even without your pastor expressing the quiet part out loud, I believe shame is baked into being seen as second in importance—or third, or fourth!
Joy, just found your site and I appreciate this post and have a contribution to your position. In 2001, the week after 911, my wife & I joined a church that was a Willow Associate Church. It was growing in the area of phase I…hooking seekers using all the check boxes. As I observed the Pastor, I saw his frustration when the Contemporary Praise Band produced CDs & went on tour. How could he control such volunteers? He killed the volunteers by putting them on the payroll. As other volunteers became vital, he quickly killed the volunteers…by putting them on the payroll. The payroll grew, the staff grew, the Pastor controlled his former volunteers by putting them on payroll - ending their volunteer spirit. Thank you for maintaining your volunteer spirit. Blessings.
Thanks, Phil. This is helpful. I hadn’t considered how adding volunteers to the payroll might be a means of control for an insecure leader. But that makes a lot of sense. What a shame. And what a loss when the dynamics change from people offering their gifts freely and generously, without the thought of being paid … to feeling required to “perform” for an employer instead.
This issue becomes a bit more complicated when, like me, the woman being treated unequally is the sole provider for her family. As much as I would like to remain content with a Mary heart, I still need to pay all my bills.
That’s a good point. Too often churches and other employers fail to consider that a woman may be the breadwinner in the family. It shouldn’t be assumed that work is “optional” for her.
I was on the tech team at a church and in the process of updating the website. One Sunday I read the church leaders' public notes about a recent meeting and found out they hired someone to make a new website. Tech team didn't know about it and everyone else on the team was so angry they refused to meet with the guy. I met with him, learned enough to know it would never work; his plans where not compatable with what we had in place and we were not going to support a change. The tech team met with the lead pastor to tell him so. He was a little put out but didn't have other options. Later, I asked him if they'd pay me to make a good website. He said words that are burned into my brain forever, "we can't pay everyone for everything they do." And that was that. I'm certain they paid the other guy for his doomed attempt but scoffed at the idea of paying me. I never finished updating the website.
Thank you for sharing what has surely been the experience of many women. Like you, I joyfully volunteered my time (I loved my congregation!) to the point that visitors often assumed I was on staff and wanted to know what my position was.
I appreciate your blunt assessment: "It was about whether the pastors thought a woman’s work for the church was valuable — at all." And "...just about any ministry run by a man took precedence over women’s programs in terms of budget, time, and staffing."
Even without your pastor expressing the quiet part out loud, I believe shame is baked into being seen as second in importance—or third, or fourth!
I look forward to reading more!